#dream.20040714: Amish ring tones
SCENE: Dimly lit bar; Miller Lite pool lamp is the main source of illumination. (Note, people are smoking, so it can’t be Burlington.) It is early and not yet crowded but starting to fill up.
I approach a friend of mine that I spot there and ask how he’s been lately. He tells me “not well” but that he’s working a half-way decent hustle that should at least get him out of the hole. When I ask him about it he is hesitant but eventually caves: “I figured out how to convert all these MP3s to ring tones and sell them to the Amish.”
No, no. That was real. The Ilves Bar in Helsinki — three years ago, before a resurrected Dead Boys opened up on the crowd with molotov cocktails at the club next door (Tavastia, i think) later that night. 4 fatalities, 10 seriously wounded, but when they played “Caught With the Meat in Your Mouth” everyone lost their shit. Rolling Stone still wants me to write a review.
Yeah, it was one of your Stoli nights, excpet some strange Finnish shit — Koskenkorva. Yeah. You conned some dwarf into stashing shots on his person - his pockets, the ass-crack of his jeans, everywhere - not warning him that you were going to consume the vodka by flipping him over. It would have been f-ing brilliant had the poor bastard not been smoking a cigarette at the time.
It was around then that we learned that “Kipsi!” was the proper way to say cheers.
Anyway, the ring tone thing never panned-out. Those cadgey Amish copped my gig and stole the technique. One of those buggy driving assholes actually had the gaul to shout some incohenrent invectives about Emmanuel Goldstein when the deal went sour.
I didn’t manage to get out of that post-Communist hell hole until I had managed to get a good portion of the under 16 population hooked on huffing Scotch Guard and cornered the market. And at that point I was more or less chased out of the country by the Finnish Mob for — get this — having poor business ethics. Cripes.
July 20th, 2004 at 5:41 pm[...] Today-ish marks the approximate/more-or-less one year anniversary of the beginning of dream-logging here at founddrama.net. Which isn’t to say that “evacuation” was the first. Far from it. But it was the beginning of it becoming a regular thing. Since then, I’ve posted almost 80 dreams, some short and vague, some long and detailed, some after the fact, and some very much immediately upon waking. Some struck a chord with strangers and others with close friends. But pretty much all of them just plain fucking weird. This is a meme that I plan on sticking with. [...]
February 15th, 2006 at 11:04 pm