I’m golfing with D.J., D.P., and my brother J. The country club is crowded. But it’s also indoors. The terrain is varied as one would expect: little hills, sand traps, scrubby woods, water hazards. But this whole course is under the kind of ceiling that you’d find at a grocery store or a warehouse. We rent clubs but between us we only have enough cash for one ball each. After waiting in line and joking about how long we’ve been waiting, we tee off at the first hole and our game is under way. I’m better at this game than I expect; certainly better than I should be for someone that’s never played before.
We keep the game casual and we joke around to keep it interesting for ourselves. We get a lot of funny looks from the regular players and country club members. But fuck those people. We paid our money to be here and we’re not breaking any rules. This one guy behind us though is taking it really personally. He’s playing a shitty game and he’s decided to take it out on us. After making some joke to D.J. (“Choke! Don’t choke!”), the man comes over and asks if I could keep it down because I’m distracting him. I fire back that he needs to be a grown-up about this and if he doesn’t mind his own business then we’re going to have a serious problem. He withdraws a bit but you can tell that we haven’t seen the last of him and it’s only a matter of time before he comes back. Even now he is plotting against us.
Fortune favors the assholes though and before we’ve played two more holes, we’ve managed to lose all of our balls to water hazards and other obstacles. We leave the indoor country club peacefully and are in good spirits until I realize that I’ve lost my phone and it’s probably still lying on the greens of that par four fifth hole.
About Rob FrieselSoftware engineer by day, science fiction writer by night. Author of The PhantomJS Cookbook and a short story in Please Do Not Remove. View all posts by Rob Friesel →
2 Responses to dream.20080921: golfing
“we’ve managed to lose all of our balls to water hazards and other obstacles”
Does that mean Dave told you the story about his battle w/ a water hazard the last time we played? You should pick up some clubs and play w/ us sometime.
ha. I don’t seem to recall that particular tale.